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Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from twlight
Review:
Interesting story. I am looking forward to more when the muse for this story bites you again.
Comments from author:
Thanks. The next chapter should be quite interesting as Xander starts his training. ;-)
Review By [twlight] • Date [31 May 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from kffs
Review:
Super fun and interesting!
WOuld love to see where this goes.

Thanks for writing!!
Comments from author:
Glad you enjoyed it. I know where I'm going with this, so it's more a matter of getting my muse to cooperate and write it down.

Like dealing with a sugared-up five year old. 0.0
Review By [kffs] • Date [16 Apr 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from DieselDriver
Review:
Sure hope there's more chapters or a sequel.
Comments from author:
Trying to get the next chapter written, but Real Life is being a bit difficult at the moment. ;-(
Review By [DieselDriver] • Date [21 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from Sanabalis
Review:
Super duper awesome! Can't wait for more! :) VERY smart choices by Xander-younger.
Comments from author:
Thanks. Given the mindset he held at that time, Xander would definitely decide to get whatever skill and abilities he could find which would help him protect his friends and support Buffy in her vocation.
Review By [Sanabalis] • Date [13 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from (Recent Donor)nerfherder
Review:
Sweet! This is soooo open to abuse! Go for it!
Comments from author:
Open to abuse?!!! I'm shocked you would think I'm capable of even contemplating such a thing!!!!!

;-)
Review By [(Recent Donor)nerfherder] • Date [9 Mar 14] • Rating [9 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from aeraveil
Review:
Literary manipulation is a bit overpowered if he can simply go in a grab what he wants. You might want to retune that to make it a bit like Disgea, where he has to go in and fight for it, then level it up to make it more balanced.
Comments from author:
I specifically referenced the 'Charmed' version literary manipulation, so as to avoid any expectations of super-duper powering up. All he's getting from this version is the ability to basically absorb knowledge from books, without having to read them, first.
Review By [aeraveil] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from Cateagle
Review:
Gone some 9+ years but only apparently gone 2 months? He's going to seem very changed when he returns. In the meantime, I have to wonder what his friends will think and worry about. Both the training and the situation on the "home front" should make for interesting story lines.
Comments from author:
Actually, he'll be just spending approximately seven years training, while his body (in another dimension and alternate time frame) is being enhanced.

And yes, a lot of people are going to notice that he's somewhat different from the Xander they left behind at the end of sophomore year.

Which should prove to be quite interesting, for a great many people. ;-)
Review By [Cateagle] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from Bobboky
Review:
nice
Comments from author:
Thanks. ;-)
Review By [Bobboky] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from Dragonbaita
Review:
VERY well done!
Comments from author:
Thanks. I appreciate your taking the time to comment. ;-)
Review By [Dragonbaita] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from SpacedCadet
Review:
Good start.

Hope the rest lives up to it.

Which means we need the rest, hopefully SOON!
Comments from author:
Thanks. I hope the rest lives up to its billing, too. ;-)
Review By [SpacedCadet] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from IrFane
Review:
Not sure where this is going, but I like how it's getting there. :)
Comments from author:
Thanks. I think you'll like seeing what's coming up. ;-)
Review By [IrFane] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Rating [8 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from wonderbee
Review:
Excellent section, and with the Elder one opening his eyes more, will look forward to seeing if all they do here will stick more, as well as what the reactions might be from the other Scoobies when they meet up with xander again.
Comments from author:
Given the training he'll be receiving, as well as the experience he'll be getting by living under actual battle conditions, Xander will be much more centered and self-assured when Season Two begins.

Something which will make the other Scoobies pay more attention to whatever he's got to say about whichever situation they're involved in.
Review By [wonderbee] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from KrisB
Review:
I'd never heard of Omnilingualism. After looking it up, though it reminded me of Cypher. It depends on how far he could stretch it. It's ability at learning marital arts would mainly be in understanding marital arts that he encounters and than able to speak that language.

Literary Manipulation is another that I'd never heard of. After reading about all the side effects of that one though, only an illiterate person wouldn't call that a near god level power. worse comes to worse, he needs to print out some fan fiction and pull "interesting" items out of the copies.

Total recall will come in very useful as well. That one would be just a useful background power. Actually, if the omnilingualism was just used for translation, I could see it being a lower rank power. Using it like Cypher and obtaining or enountering real marital artists? That one could be really nasty.

I'm mixed on calling it Slayer Space Marine Lite. I'd call it just boosted imperial guard with enhanced recovery, which actually fits him better.

Actually, instead of boosting him physically like that, it might be "cheaper" for him to be given something like "merely" really enhanced recovery and make him learn all those other enhancements... Send him to a "safe" version of Ranma to learn under. He'd get enhanced skin, super speed, super recovery, super leaping, maybe strength, as well as those marital abilities.

Force Recon or Ranger training is seriously downgraded on the space marine training. Actually, most of these options could be rigged by using features of that halloween spell and the hyena. The actual Hyena gave some stats that were higher than Buffy's. You could just say that the bulk of it got banished, and they didn't have as much to work with on that front.

Well, than you had to give him master-level weaponsmith and metalworking training from either Hephaestus or one of the Cabeiri, so that he'll be able to make pretty much anything he thinks he needs with the right tools and materials. That would also give him the cleric abilities of being a priest, making a holy water/weapons.

Have you read the Builder's Challenge? It actually sounds rather similiar to how he'd end up with some slight differences.

With those powers, I could see how he could easily "cheat" and come back really badly over powered. I giggle at the mere thought of it. I keep thinking that he needs some Ranma type marital artists training. Literary Manipulation can apparently be used to dive into books or use them as portals. I'd suggest Ranma and Dragon Ball, but not Dragon Ball Z. Diving into a Ranma style book would give him many styles of marital arts. If he could make it through the entire series, he'd pick up an awesome amount of odd styles. Dragon Ball is more about pure power. The "basics" of that series should be more than enough for the Buffy verse.

Being able to build damn near anything will be ground breaking for him. That's what really makes me think of the Builders thing. If he can pull items out of books or manga, the single item that he needs to try for would be an unactivated Guyver unit.

On your time dilation math. I got 8.3 years subjective that he'd be gone. Well, I guess that works. 1.3 years for "training" and the other 7 years for actual "service."

Literary Manipulation seems to be the most over powered one. I hope that you didn't just give him the watered down version that is in Charmed though. That looked like mere speed reading.

I liked the first definition that I came across for it.
Literary Manipulation: The power to manipulate books, manuscript pages, and text paper. Variation of Art Manipulation.

We are talking entering book worlds, pulling items/people from books as summons, and using note books as storage think Naruto style storage steals.

One of the apps of the power is Omnilegence know all currently written material (this updates constantly). I think that it would be more like being able to "instantly read" any material within their sphere of influence, usually being home, personal office, or claimed library. It would rock if you could develop the skill enough to read an entire library or book store by merely wandering through it once.

Xander hates to read and spend time looking crap up. He is an adventurer at heart. I could see him "lucking out" and getting the better version of the power without anyone really being the wiser about it.

Under some of the descriptions of Literary Manipulation, you could pull out/summon anything found within your reading material, but usually the user can only carry around a book or within their library having access to everything. That might have worked before the information age and digital books. O.k. it might be abit early for him to have an ipad, but really with his ability to make anything, I could see him making something like an ipad in the mid 90s and having access to an entire massive library worth of information / summons / items at any given moment.

The only real issue on this is what one of the reviewers mentioned about him not notifying anyone that he was going. Actually, I think that you nullified that quite nicely by the time frame that you picked. I actually didn't bother with reading the dates until I finished reading all 3 of these chapters.

I was than wondering "which version" of Xander is this? This is Season 1 ending Xander. Whoa. That's a major curve ball that you are throwing here. Willow is likely the only one that couldn't find Xander. Buffy was out of town and Giles was likely not on their speed dial at the time. Xander could show back up before school starts and say something like he was shipped off to either summer camp or better yet a summer military boot camp. The only major issue will be his parents and if they declared him missing and/or moved while he was gone.

That actually is much worse than Buffy or Giles noticing anything. Where will Xander live when he gets back and his parents have moved and/or "magically" don't recall him?
Comments from author:
First off, thanks for the extensive review - it's much appreciated. ;-)

Second, since I specifically had Young Xander mentioning 'Charmed' as part of his inspiration, I would expect people to check with the show's canon to see what I meant by the term, literary manipulation, and not just arbitrarily decide what I intended it to mean. In 'Charmed', literary manipulation is defined as "the ability to scan and absorb the content of a book at a rapid speed, simply by holding hands over the text." Nothing more, nothing less. It's an extremely quick way of learning the contents of any book, without having to spend a lot of time reading it, or trying to translate it (and hoping the translation was correct), and is the perfect solution for someone who doesn't want to waste time reading old books written in ancient languages no one can currently speak. When combined with omnilingualism, it would allow him to read *anything* and understand what the writers were talking about, with total recall enabling him to never forget anything he read, saw, heard or experienced.

As far as the "Slayer Space Marine Lite' enhancements are concerned, he specifically asked for training and upgrades to allow him to provide better backup for Buffy than she currently has, and that's what he got. He isn't a vastly better fighter, he's just *much* better physical backup now than he was, since he'll be able to fight on a near-equal level as most of the vamps and demons they encounter.

Doing anything more than that would be approaching the Xander-Stu trope, which I'm trying to avoid, as well as the 'Xander gets enhanced and can now out-Slayer-ize Buffy' cliche that show up.

And his weapon-smithing and metalworking training will allow him to make Buffy and the rest of the Scoobies the weapons they need, IF he has the materials and time he needs to forge or make them. He won't be able to just create them out of thin air, as though from a spell.

By doing things this way, I can maintain Xander's general mindset from that time period, which was: give Buffy as much support as he can, so as to make sure she stays alive and healthy.

His seven years of experience fighting on the front lines of battle against evil will give the same sort of military mindset which he received after the Halloween spell in canon, and will enable him to provide Buffy with advice based on actual field experience, as opposed to the theoretical knowledge Giles possesses and the instincts Buffy got along with her Slayer powers.

And yes, setting this at the end of Season One is going to have MAJOR repercussions on the following seasons for ALL members of the Scooby Gang. ;-)

Thanks for reading, reviewing and making such interesting and incisive comments. ;-)
Review By [KrisB] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from JediKnight
Review:
Very nice job on the new chapter, I'm looking forward to the crossovers.
Comments from author:
Yeah, those should be interesting. ;-)
Review By [JediKnight] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Rating [10 out of 10]
Review of chapter "Chapter Three" from (Recent Donor)JanessaRavenwood
Review:
Sounds like a decent deal, but one little problem. You think he might have arranged to *tell someone* first?! Everyone will be frantic at him missing for 2 months, furious at him when he turns back up, and suspicious of his newfound physical abilities. I mean, if someone from BtVS suddenly disappears and then reappears some time later, with enhanced physical abilities, what's the first and mostly likely conclusion to reach? They've been vamped. Not true here, of course, but it's still the most likely possibility, from the perspective of anyone not in on what really happened.
Comments from author:
Yeah, it's a great deal. And that detail will be addressed in the next chapter.

Remember, Traveler-Xander has been doing this for a while, now, so he knows what needs to be done, and how best to handle things. ;-)
Review By [(Recent Donor)JanessaRavenwood] • Date [2 Mar 14] • Not Rated
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