This is what you get when you watch a cassic Disney film and wonder what would happen if someone else tagged along especially after seeing that Katherine Sutherland played the role of Mae Thompson. This isn't a story, maybe someone else has the time to write the movie with Buffy participatig, I sadly do not.Disclaimer: Buffy and all things Slayer belong to Joss and ME Productions. Honey I Shrunk the Kids and all related characters belong to Walt Disney Studios. I don't own anything I just wrote this up for fun and entertaining purposes.
How I Spent My Summer Vacation
By Buffy Summers
This summer mommy and daddy went on a second honeymoon and left me with my Aunt Mae and Uncle Russel, Aunty Mae is my mommies’ twin, she and mommy look so much alike it’s totally scary. I was upset because my cousins Ronald and Russel don’t really like me too much, because they’re icky nasty boys and all they ever do is boy stuff.
I told mommy it was a bad idea, but mommy said she knew what was best, but I was right. Uncle Russel and Aunt Mae were going on a fishing trip during the summer, and I had to tag along even though I hate fish, plus there wasn’t anyplace for me to do any skating, that was so totally not fair.
But we never got to the lake, see Ronald was goofing around with his baseball and bat again and broke the neighbors attic window, I totally was going to tell on him but Russel saw it too and made us go over to apologize. Ok so I pitched to Ronald because he made me do it, but it wasn’t my fault he can’t hit his ball so it won’t go into peoples’ attics. He is such a klutz. I think the neighbors were called the Slinkies or something, it was a funny last name, Nick was kind of cute for a total geek. All he did was talk about numbers and math and stuff, boys are icky but some of them are cute like Trey, he’s this boy in seventh grade and he has this dreamy looking car. Well his mom has it, he’ll be able to drive it when he’s older, and yes I know I’m only eight and a half years old so there.
Nick took Ronald and me upstairs to get the ball, his dad is this mad science type guy, he builds stuff in his attic that do all kinds of nutty things. This time he was working on a shrink ray, you know to make things tiny and stuff, well Ronalds’ dumb ball turned the machine on, I mean what are the chances of that even happening? Dumb Ronald.
The machine hit us with this ray thingy it was like totally Hollywood level special effects lasers and junk, Nick, Ronald and me shrunk to practically the size of dust and we were too tiny to get to the machine to fix us. Then Russel came in with Nicks’ sister Amy, she was really pretty and kind of cool for an older girl, I don’t care what anybody says I was so not scared when I found out we were shrunk. But Amy kind of made it easier being shrunk too.
We got swept up by Nicks’ dad after he got mad ‘cause he didn’t know the thing worked, I mean if he had big ears like a dog maybe he could have heard us shouting. Being inside a trash bag is no fun. It was gross and slimy and I think I fell into an empty pudding cup ‘cause I was like the only one covered in white gunk. We all had to get back to Nick and Amys’ dad if we were going to get big again, so we walked through their backyard, and could it kill them to mow the lawn when they’re supposed to? Yeesh, the grass was like giant, the bugs were like giant, the only thing not giant was us.
It wasn’t so bad, at least I didn’t get grabbed by that giant bee or fall into icky gross mud and seeing a river of dog pee makes me totally glad that we don’t own a dog, that was disgusting. The sprinklers turned on at one point, it was like we were getting bombed, water was raining down in these big droplets. Least I got the pudding out of my hair.
I suppose it was kind of fun, especially when Ronald, Russel and Nick tried to get this ant to help us after we found the mother of all cookies. I’m talking huge, no it had to be hugemongous. Wait is that even a word? I wish I had a cookie that big right now, it’d take me all year just to finish it, I’d be so fat after I ate it though I’d never fit in my skirts again.
The scorpion attacked us when we tried to go to bed, now that was kind of scary. Ok it was totally freaky, I screamed, I think I wet myself. I didn’t tell anybody though. At least not until now. After a night of being totally creeped out and worried the scorpion would come back I was thinking nothing worse could happen. Then the lawnmower came out, yeah like now was the best time to do something that obviously hadn’t been done for five years. We almost got cut to teeny tiny pieces.
But we got close to the house, Quark helped us the rest of the way, that’s the Slinkies dog. Nicks’ dad almost ate him with his cheerios, I wasn’t worried too much though, we were finally out of that jungle they call a backyard. I’ll miss the cookie though.
Mister Slinky made us big again and Aunty Mae cried, I was only gone for two days, they said we didn’t have to tell mommy about it or anybody else. After that there really wasn’t anything else exciting that happened, after you get shrunk to the size of dust nothing can really be exciting again. Aunty Mae invited me to come visit this thanksgiving, I might just do that if I can get another super huge cookie. Hmmmm I wonder if Mister Slinky told anybody about his machine? I think everybody deserves giant cookies and things, I wonder what a giant ice cream sundae would look like?
That’s what I did this summer.