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Summary: In honor of Dogbertcarroll's 'Flickering Lights', a bunch of mostly Xander centered one-shots.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > GeneralCrazyDanFR187074,13440986607,38316 Feb 1230 Oct 14No

The Sandwich Maker...

The Sandwich Maker...

Or the reason Dawn studies languages, not math.....

“So A plus B equals C?” Dawn asked Xander.

“Seriously a tree stump Is better at math than I am. Why am I here?” Xander asked the younger teen.

“Mom is working and Buffy and Willow are busy at college.” Dawn reminded him. “It's here or whatever job you're working right now.”

“Fair enough.” Xander shrugged. “Just do the example a few times and work from that.” He told her before poking whatever it was she had on the plate by her.

“Hey, no poking my food.” Dawn said with a hint of a glare.

“How is that food?” Xander asked her as he stared at his red finger. “Is this paprika?”

“Yes.” Dawn told him. “It's only the best topping ever.”

This week anyways.

“If you say so.” Xander said with a shudder.

“So...” Dawn said as she started munching on her sandwich. She began trying to explain her math homework while chewing only to sneeze three times in rapid succession.

After the third sneeze a small hole in reality appeared over the kitchen table that spat out a yellow colored ping pong ball with the number '625' on it.

“Well... I think I finally understand why parents don't want their children to talk with their mouth full.” Xander said after a moment.

“So where are the other 624 balls?” Dawn asked him.

“No idea. Whatever you do, never mumble again.” Xander cautioned her.

“I'll try.” Dawn told him. “So... now what?”

“It could be a ping pong ball, or it could be an egg.” Xander said with a shrug. “Let's boil it just to be sure.”

“Like those weird egg baby things from a few years ago?” Dawn asked as she scrunched her nose up in disgust.

“Exactly.” Xander told her. “Best to kill it before it becomes a bigger problem.”

Dawn nodded as she watched her crush fill a pot with water and place it on the stove. He turned the eye to High and dropped the little ball in.

A moment later a yellow furred little demon jumped out of the pot and shook himself dry as his body continued to grow until he was close to the size of a kindergartner.

“Well... this is new.” The furred demon said as he looked around the kitchen. “Hmmm.” It said before opening the fridge and it began digging around inside of it. “ I can work with this. It said before sniffing a loaf of bread that was in a drawer. “Rye. Nice.”

“Umm... what?” Dawn asked Xander.

“Beats me.” Xander shrugged as the two watched the little demon do it's thing.

“And done.” The demon said a few minutes later as he set a plate on the table in front of Xander.

Xander hesitantly took a bite of the proffered sandwich before grinning at the little demon. “Nice.” Xander said after he finished chewing and swallowing his first bite.

“I try.” The little demon said as he buffed his fingernails on his chest.

“What's your name?” Dawn asked it.

“Well, I was called experiment 625 but that doesn't really seem to fit.” The little demon said with a shrug.

“Well... what do you like to do?” Dawn asked it.

“Sandwiches.” The demon said.

“And how.” Xander said as he patted his stomach. “That was an awesome Reuben.”

“Ruben.” Dawn said as she perked up. “That's a perfect name for you.”

“Okay.” The now named Ruben said with a nod. “Works for me.”

“Say... have you ever been to a Denny's?” Xander asked Ruben.

“What's that?” Ruben asked.

“It's a Restaurant.” Dawn told him. “An American style eatery.”

“Okay.” Ruben said with a nod. “Never been. Sounds neat.”

“Wait till you try a Moon over My Hammy.” Xander told him before looking at the little creature. “Well.. even in this town we might have to get take out.”

“Okay.” Ruben said. “Let's go.”

“Later.” Dawn said. “Mom should be home pretty soon.”

“Should we tell her about our little sandwich maker?” Xander asked her.

“Hang on.” Dawn said before turning to Ruben. “Do you know what a toilet is?”

“No. But I can learn.” Ruben told her.

“Well... after he's housebroken.” Dawn told Xander.

“Give me a couple of minutes.” Xander told her as before getting Ruben to follow him to the downstairs bathroom.

“I wonder if Buffy would like a Sandwich maker.” Dawn mused. “Nah. That dorm probably has a no pets policy.”

“Where did those other arms come from!?” Xander yelled from inside the bathroom.

“You said to let it all out.” Ruben said defensively.

Dawn shook her head before looking at her homework on the table.

“Stupid Math.” She said as he stared at her Algebra textbook. “I never had this kind of problem with my Spanish homework.”


Experiment 625 is part of the Lilo and Stitch franchise. Frankly he was the mustard that held that series together.
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