Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or worlds used in this story, including the American Pie franchise, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, House M.D., or Scott Pilgrim. No harm is intended toward any of the copyright owners. This story is intended for entertainment purposes only.+++++PREVIOUSLY: Faith has been through a lot over the past year. With the help of her friends, she's realized she needs some time away. Now that Willow's in charge, Faith just has to find a place to stay...+++++FIVE: JEANINEWarning: This chapter contains rude humor.
Jeanine heard the motorcycle pull up just in time to take the cookies out of the oven. Not that she made them from scratch, of course -- she didn't bake anything -- but it had been a small thing to go down to the store and pick up a dough-tube. When she'd gotten the call from Matt, she'd initially been opposed to the idea of letting a slayer stay at her house, but when Matt had explained the whole story... well, Jeanine empathized with the girl.
And now the girl was at the front door, ringing the bell.
Jeanine opened the door. "You must be Faith?"
Jeanine looked her up and down: motorcycle leathers, white tank-top, gorgeous dark hair despite it having been under a helmet for the five-hour ride to East Great Falls, and a pair of soulful dark eyes. Also, one hell of a pair of tits, which could be problematic. "I'm Jeanine Stifler," she said, extending a hand. Faith shook it. Then Jeanine stepped out of the way, allowing Faith to enter -- she might not be an active watcher anymore, but she still knew the rules about inviting people into her home. If only Steve had been more cautious about that, maybe she wouldn't have that scar on her back.
"Nice place you got here, Mrs. S," Faith said. Jeanine saw a shadow flit across the younger woman's face -- because Faith was no girl; no, she was all woman, this one -- as she said it. "And thanks for putting me up."
"It's no problem at all," she said. "And, please, call me Jeanine."
"Okay. Jeanine." Faith sniffed. "You made cookies?"
"I wanted to make a good impression." Well, that wasn't the truth, but from what Matt had told her, Faith needed something normal, and moms baking cookies... that was about as normal as it got for Jeanine Stifler. "Would you like one?"
"Please." The word sounded strange coming from Faith, as if she was putting on a 'best behavior' act, but Jeanine shrugged it off and led Faith into the kitchen. She poured Faith a glass of milk. "Thank you," Faith said.
"Of course." Jeanine sat across from Faith at the kitchen table. "So, Matt tells me you're going to need a place to stay for a while. Do you know how long?"
Faith shook her head, dunked a cookie in the milk, and took what was, for a slayer, a small bite. "Dunno yet," she said. "But I'll pay for the room and board, and--"
"You don't have to do that," Jeanine said. "You're not the first slayer to have a room here."
"So I'm told."
Jeanine nodded. Matt wasn't Faith's watcher, but he'd offered Faith the room at his mother's house -- Jeanine's house -- and, as cynical as Jeanine was, she wouldn't turn a slayer away. It just wasn't done. "What are you going to do?"
"Well, I can help you around the house, if you need," Faith said. "I was thinkin' about maybe getting a job as a sub at the high school. I got the credentials."
Another nod. Jeanine knew what Faith did back in Cleveland. And she was starting to hear Faith's accent now, too -- something from the south side of Boston, if she was guessing correctly. "I'll get you a set of keys," she said, pushing her chair back from the table. "Just, keep an eye out for my son, would you?"
"Who, Matt? Isn't he still in Chicago?"
"Not Matt," Jeanine said. "Steve."
Faith shrugged. "Matt's cool. I'm sure Steve's cool too."
Just then the back door opened. "Hey, mom, whose bike is that out front? And why do I smell cookies?" Then Jeanine saw the new arrival catch sight of Faith. "Holy shit," he whispered. "Holy, holy shit!"
"Faith," Jeanine said, "meet Steve."
Faith smiled and stood up, offering Steve her hand. "Hi, Steve. Nice to meet'cha."
"Hello," Steve said. His eyes had yet to lift from Faith's not-inconsiderable chest. Faith glanced at Jeanine, and Jeanine gave her the slightest nod.
Steve was on his knees then, his hand held tight in Faith's. His mouth was open and he was trying to pull away from her, but to no avail. And then Faith was leaning over him, and Steve, bless his heart, still couldn't stop looking at her cleavage. "I'm only gonna tell you this once, Steve," Faith said, her voice soft and deadly. "I'm here to get away from everything for a little while. Your little bro and your mom are helpin' me out. I'm not here to fuck you, I'm not here to be your eye candy, and I'm certainly not gonna change the way I dress 'cause you can't stop staring. And, hey, I know I got great tits."
"Oh, God, you really do," Steve moaned, his face almost white. "God, I just wanna stick my face in there and--"
Faith let go and grabbed her milk. She poured it over Steve's head even as he clutched his right hand to his chest, suddenly free of her grip. "Just imagine what'll happen if I gotta grab something else, yeah?"
Steve cringed. "Yeah," he said, his voice a bit higher than usual. "Okay. I got it."
"Good." Faith shrugged and went to the counter to grab the paper towels. "Sorry 'bout the mess."
"No worries," Jeanine said. "He deserved it."
Later that afternoon, as Faith unpacked what few clothes she'd brought along, Jeanine was passing by Steve's room. "Crush my jacking hand," he was grumbling. "I'll show her. I'll show her just what the Stifmeister can do!"
And then Jeanine heard Faith's laughter -- the slayer had surely heard what Steve had said, and if her son thought his usual tactics would work on a woman like her... well, Jeanine just hoped Faith didn't kick him too hard. That sort of injury would definitely raise her insurance premiums.+++++The End+++++Author's Note:
This series of stories was directly inspired by the people who took issue with Chris and Faith's relationship in "On Allison/Sarah". After writing that story, and getting the plot bunny out of my head, I realized that I didn't have anywhere to go with the relationship itself. Unfortunately that meant shipping Chris off to parts unknown -- my guess is that he'll still be with the ICW, but in another city, and that he'll go back to being an MD instead of continuing as a therapist.
But what it also did was give me an opportunity to, eventually, tell a Faith story.
The night before I finished writing this, I watched American Reunion
, and shortly thereafter I checked out the "American Pie" category here on TtH. There's not a lot. I wanted to rectify that, and also have a little fun with the characters. I don't know yet if Stifler is going to get Faith in bed or not, but I do know that there's more to tell about Faith's little vacation to East Great Falls, Michigan.
The next "On" interlude/story sets up the Big Bad for the next big "On" piece. While that story is happening, Faith is going to be in East Great Falls, out of the fight and getting her head back into the game. I don't know when those two pieces will be written -- I have yet to plan out "On 4" (these interludes are "On 3").
I hope you've enjoyed these conversations with Faith. Thanks for your continued support, readership, and reviews. The final "On 3" interlude will arrive on November 26, and it's a two-parter featuring a character from Angel. See you then. Listener
Marietta, GA, USA
November 16, 2012