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Red Leather is a Valid Lifestyle Choice

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This story is No. 6 in the series "The Xander and Vi collection". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: When Xander and Vi are ‘on a break’ Faith decides to step up. Costumes are involved but it’s Not Another Halloween Fic.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > ComedyShyBobFR1311,256031,55428 Dec 1228 Dec 12Yes
Story Notes: Halloween costume stereotype-buster. References characters and situations from previous stories in the Xander and Vi series.

Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all associated characters are property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy Productions, United Paramount Network, and Fox Television. This work is not for profit, and no ownership of aforementioned copyrighted material implied, nor any infringement intended.


* * *


Xander tried very hard to be still on the bed. He was painfully aware of the brunette Slayer’s proximity. He carefully cleared his throat. “Umm, Faith, I’m not sure about this.”

Faith leaned in even closer. She listened to Xander’s breath hitch, but ignored it. “Relax, X, I got it covered.”

As the scent of Faith’s perfume fill his nose, Xander tried unsuccessfully to get a little more space between their bodies. “Look, Vi and I-”

“I swear, Harris you’re such a wuss sometimes. I promise, this’ll be good.”

“But it itches!” Xander reached up to scratch the side of his nose with a finger.

“Don’t touch it, or I swear I’ll smack you,” Faith said as she finished applying the paint. “Okay, you’re done,” she said a few moments later.

“So, how do I look,” Xander asked.

Faith scooted her chair back from the edge of the bed, paint swab in hand. “You look great. So, how ‘bout me?”

Xander considered the question carefully. “Faith, you look, uh...”

“I’ll take that as ‘fan-fucking-tastic.’” Faith grabbed the rest of her costume and headed for the door. “Let’s go, boytoy.”

“Faith,” Xander sighed in exasperation. “I’m not even sure I should go.”

“Wuss,” sounded back from the open door of the suite.


* * *


The conversation volume decreased drastically as the costumed pair entered the academy cafeteria, recently redecorated as a ballroom. The first was blue with patches of purple, while the second was a sickly green with a single eye.

“Oh my God, Xander, that is so awesome!” Dawn’s cry was not as ear-piercing as when she was younger, so the green-painted man didn’t flinch but managed a smile. When Xander reached up to rub his nose where it itched his hand was smacked away by a blue-furred paw.

“Don’t touch the damn body paint,” a voice rasped.

“Ow, Faith,” Xander complained.

Dawn turned her attention to the painted Slayer. “And um, Faith, your costume is very-”

“That’s not how Sully is supposed to look,” shrilled Andrew as he rushed up to the group, lightsaber swinging wildly at his belt. “You look like Mystique and the Beast’s love child!”

Faith stared at Andrew until he stopped talking. The purple bikini over her blue-painted skin was striking, but wholly at odds with the fuzzy blue monster slippers and gloves. A Sully mask propped up on her forehead completed the ensemble.

Dawn squinted at Faith’s costume, trying to figure out exactly why it set off her weird-o-meter, when a firm voice demanded, “Xander!”

Around the room, already subdued conversations stilled and the song ‘Dead Man’s Party’ came to an end. The whispered, “Oh shit,” from Rona the DJ was clearly audible through the sound system.

“Xander, what are you doing?” Red stiletto-heeled boots clicked across the floor, while matching leather pants, corset, and a pair of apparently real sais rounded out Vi’s costume.

“Oh, my goddess,” whispered Dawn as she backed up hastily.

“What?” Xander’s voice cracked. “Vi, you said we were on a break.”

Vi scowled. “I meant we should take a break, like for a breather, out of each others’ hair. I didn’t mean for you to come to the Halloween party with Faith!”

“Hey,” Faith complained.

“Back off,” Vi commanded.

There was collective intake of breath in the room. Then Faith turned and walked away. One of the new Slayers in a cowgirl costume had a gleeful expression during the drama, but scowled as Vi remained standing next to Xander.

Vi watched Faith’s retreating blue form for a moment before turning her attention back to Xander. “Look, it’s been stressful with the new season’s patrolling schedule, and my classes at Tri-C-”

“I’m so sorry,” Xander interrupted. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He scratched the side of his nose that was itching like crazy, wiping off a bit of green paint in the process.

Over at the DJ table, Rona finally had the presence of mind to cue another song. At the same time conversations picked up when everyone saw there wasn’t going to be a Slayer fight. Chao-Ahn walked over to the dark-skinned DJ and offered her one of the cups she carried. As Rona sipped, Chao-Ahn said, “I always knew Vi would find a way to dress up as a leather dominatrix for Xander.”

“Bitch,” mumbled Rona moments later as she began wiping her mouthful of sprayed punch off of the sound system as Chao-Ahn went to talk to other party-goers.

Halfway around the room, Faith stood by the punchbowl, awkwardly topping off her drink from her flask. “Stupid monster paws.”

“Drinking away your sorrows over your lost date?” Giles carefully poured himself a cup of punch before facing the very blue Slayer.

Faith glanced at Giles, then smiled when she looked towards the center of the room, where Xander and Vi were dancing. “Nah, I love it when a good plan comes together.”

“Hmm, yes, I was rather surprised when I heard Xander was to be your date for the evening.”

“Well, I couldn’t let ‘Slutty Cowgirl’ over there get her hooks into him while Vi was being stupid, could I?”

“Quite.” Giles noted that Sue, the slayer Xander had recruited in Texas, glared daggers alternately at Vi and Faith. “I’d thought you were rather fond of our, ah, Texas contingent,” Giles said diplomatically.

Faith took a deep drink before replying. “Sure, she’s a good troop. But if she thinks she’s going to poach a man off of one of my best buds, she’s got another thing coming.”

“In any case, I’m quite pleased that your plan came together,” Giles said as he watched Sue glare at the now-happy couple.

“You don’t think she’d try to rustle up Anya’s spirit or something, do you,” Faith asked quietly as she looked at the Sue in her Daisy Dukes and Stetson.

“No, although I wouldn’t rule out some of Anya’s old co-workers. Xander definitely threw a wrench in D'Hoffryn’s finely-oiled vengeance machine.”

“Yeah, I know. Well, if you need someone to put a smackdown on the rodeo clown, or any vengeance demons, let me know.”

“I most assuredly will, Faith.” But by the time Giles was done speaking, Faith had turned and strode towards Rona at the DJ table. He turned to see what could have driven off such a hardy soul and found himself face to face with Andrew in a Jedi costume.

“So Giles, do you think Xander might change his costume to Daredevil, because that would be so cool.”

“Err, what,” Giles asked.

“Elektra and Daredevil. From the comics, and well, the movies,” Andrew said the latter with disgust.

“Andrew, what on earth are you talking about,” Giles asked.

“He was a blinded warrior for justice, and she a violent killer. Theirs was a tortured romance,” sighed Andrew as he watched Vi and Xander head toward the exit, and presumably their room.

“I thought Vi had forbidden you from making comic book or movie references about her,” Giles said.

“Fine, be that way,” Andrew replied before he flounced off in a not very Jedi-like manner.


FIN


* * *

Author’s Note: I think Vi’s costume is somewhere between Felicia Day in dominatrix gear (Not Safe For Work) and Elektra on wikipedia. Xander and Faith were Mike and Sully from Monsters, Inc, in case someone didn't figure it out.

The End

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