Xander Mercenary - the sequel
Xander Mercenary –Sequel
Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters or the
Shows involved in this story. The story itself
However is mine.
A few hours after the Big Boom.
“Are you telling me that no one knows who the
Tauseniggans are?” General Hammond looked
around the table at the various individuals. The
only people who knew about what really happened
just past Jupiter sat around the table trying their best
to come up with answers.
“The Tokra have no knowledge of such a Race.”
Selmac/Jacob Carter admitted.
“Nor do my people,” Thor added. “And, I am still
curious about the name of the ship.”
“It is a very odd name.” Teal’c agreed. “What is a
‘Post Dated Check Loan’?”
“It’s something that I just don’t feel like trying to
explain right now.” O’Neill replied.
“But you do understand the reference?” Teal’c
“Why interesting?” O’Neill asked.
“I think what Teal’c is trying to say, is the term in
question is recognizable to humans.” Daniel
elaborated, “And Captain Harris does sound like a
“So Daniel,” O’Neill replied, “have you ever heard
of a Tauseniggan?”
“No,” Daniel admitted, “Although the name sounds
familiar for some reason.”
“So we’re back to square one.” O’Neill shook his
head, “We need the answers to three questions.”
“Three questions, Sir?” Sam Carter asked.
“Who the hell is this Harris and What the hell is a
Tauseniggan Thunderhead Superfortress, and how
can I get one.”
“C’mon Carter.” O’Neill leaned back in his chair.
“Something that can kick Goauld butt like that, of
course I want one.”
“Of course,” Sam rolled her eyes.
“Uhm, Sir.” A young airman entered the room. “I
know you didn’t want to be disturbed, but Colonel
O’Neill has a priority message.”
“From who?” General Hammond asked.
“Uh, that’s the weird part.” The Airman admitted,
“It just appeared on the computer. I don’t recognize
the name, but I really think you want to see it.”
“Okay,” O’Neill nodded, “Things couldn’t get any
weirder today. Forward to the conference room
“Yes sir.” The Airman saluted.
“So,” O’Neill said as they waited, “How do we...”
“Uh, Jack?” Daniel interrupted him, “You need to
“What?” O’Neill glanced down at the screen, then
did a double take. On the screen was a picture of a
Mothership Bridge. Anubis stood dead center,
backing away from whoever took the picture.
Around him various Jaffa were looking in shock at
the camera. On the bottom of the picture, someone
had penned a message. “Dear Colonel O’Neill.
Thought you might like to see the looks on the faces
of the Goauld just before the Boom. Signed,
Captain Harris of the Tauseniggan Thunder
Superfortress Post dated check loan.”
“Oh for crying out...” O’Neill stopped as he noticed
Daniel and Sam looking amused. “Something
“It’s just,” Daniel started, “It’s just something you’d
“He’s got a point, Colonel.” Sam agreed.
“Okay, so this ‘Captain Harris’ has my sense of
humor.” O’Neill chuckled, “I just wish Anubis had
a face so I could see the look on it. How in the hell
did he get this picture?”
“What I want to know is,” General Hammond
stated, “how did he get this image sent?”
Xander chuckled softly to himself as Petey sent the
image to Stargate Command. “Hey Petey. What’s
a Stargate anyway?”
“I’m not 100% certain, Captain.” Petey replied,
“From the verbal descriptions, I’ve ascertained that
it was a miniature version of a Wormgate.”
“So the military has access to a FTL transport
“More than one.” Petey pulled up the schematics
for a small, well smaller than him, starship. “This is
the X-303 Prometheus, the first Terran built
“Nice,” Xander examined design, “They should
have called it Enterprise.”
“I believe that was Colonel O’Neill’s first
suggestion.” Petey noted. “Apparently they still
have a few problems with the power throughput in
the engines. The fuel source they are using requires
a buffer to allow the FTL engine to work properly.
I’ve already come up with a modified version of
their design that is less prone to disruption by
external forces. I’ve even come up with several
new alloying techniques that Stargate Command
can use to improve the structural integrity of the X-
“You did that al...” Xander stopped, suddenly
remembering just how smart Petey was. “You’ve
“Not really.” Petey sighed. “Rebuilding the ship
didn’t take very many computing cycles. So I ended
up accessing several of you communications
satellites to keep myself occupied.”
“Including the Military ones.” Xander smiled. “Any
other dirt you can dish?”
“Hmm,” Petey reviewed the pertinent data. “A
government Black Ops unit known as the N.I.D. has
a research facility under the University of
California, Sunnydale location.”
Xander gaped in shock at the Hologram, “Okay, see
now that’s the kind of information you need to get
to me A.S.A.P.”
“Construction only started a few months ago, Sir.”
Petey replied, “I used their surveillance satellites to
pinpoint the work being done. They’re using a
fraternity house as cover.”
“Frat boys.” Xander shook his head, “That’s...
That’s not a bad cover.”
“I assume you wish me to continue monitoring
“Yeah,” Xander nodded, then he remembered
something that slipped his mind during the attack.
“Hey, where are the Jonathan and Andrew?”
“Inside one of the labs,” Petey replied, “I had to
shoo them away from Commander Andreyasn’s
room twice already.”
“Please, tell me they’re not playing with something
“Of Course not sir.” Petey looked affronted.
“They’re working on a teraport.”
“Oh, that’s...” Xander choked on his own words.
“You’re letting them play with a teraport? They
could wind up porting themselves to Mars.”
“One can only hope.” Petey smiled.
““Petey,” Xander sighed and thought about what to
say, “This is a direct order, I want you to consider
every person I’ve brought abroad this ship so far, as
a member of your crew. Is that clear?”
Petey visibly deflated, “Does that mean I can’t want
someone to blow them out an airlock?”
“No,” Xandger grinned. “Lord, knows, I’ve wanted
to do it a couple of times since I met them. Just
don’t actually do it. Okay?”
“Yes, sir.” Petey replied.
“Can you make sure that they don’t actually send
themselves, or anything else into deep space?”
“I’ll inform them that you wish for them to stop
playing with the Teraport.” Petey pouted. “They’ll
just get into something else.”
“Just make sure it’s not something dangerous.”
Xander nodded. “And don’t bother with wounded
puppy dog eyes. I’ve been worked over by expert in
that. I’m pretty much immune to anyone else.”
“Yes, sir.” Petey sighed. “I hope you realize sir,
that not even Sgt. Schlock was as annoying as those
two. At least the Toughs antics were amusing.”
“I appreciate your patience, Petey.” Xander told
him, “Anything else, before I get back to the
“I’d like permission to begin incorporating the
Prometheus design hyper-drive into my systems.”
“Why? Xander frowned, “Isn’t the teraport faster?”
“Yes,” Petey acknowledged, “However, having a
back-up is always a good idea.”
“Right,” Xander nodded, “You can maintain all of
this equipment right?”
“Of course,” Petey nodded emphatically. “I’ve also
examining the wreckage of the Goauld ships. They
have completely different approach to shielding.
I’m going have to devote a few free cycles to
“Sure thing,” Xander nodded absently, finally he
“Can you break this tutorial down into words I can
“Of course, sir.” Petey smiled, that one of the things
Petey liked about his new Captain. Tagon had been
a passably good leader, a decent tactician and was
becoming a good friend but he did have a tendency
to believe he had all the answers. Xander Harris
was willing to admit to his limitations. Petey
realized that Captain Harris was actually prone to
underestimating himself at times.
“I suppose I’ll have to work on that.” Petey thought,
“Can’t have a indecisive Captain.”
Several Days later.
“God damn it!” Jack O’Neill cursed as the latest
round of answers came in. None of the races they’d
encountered had ever heard of a Race called the
Tauseniggans. “This is insane.”
“Sorry, Jack.” Daniel shrugged. “We’ll just have to
keep looking. Maybe I read the name in an old
“Right,” O’Neill shook his head, “An old
manuscript about a ‘Tauseniggan Thunderhead
The Airman delivering messages dropped them in
shock. “Sir, did you say Tauseniggan Thunderhead
“Airman?” Sam turned to eye the young woman.
“Have you heard of a race called the Tauseniggan?”
“Sir,” The Airman stiffened, “If you’ve been given
information about such a race, then you’ve been the
victim of a practical joke.”
“Explain that remark.” O’Neill frowned.
“The Tauseniggan Thunderhead Superfortress is
from an on-line comic, Sir.” The Airman looked
worried, “It’s called ‘Schlock Mercenary’, Sir.”
“Schock...” Daniel frowned deep in concentration.
His eyes widened in realization and he snapped his
fingers. “Now I remember.”
“Daniel?” Sam asked. “Remember what?”
“Tauseniggan!” Daniel replied, “I was on-line a few
weeks ago. One of my old colleagues mentioned
that series during a on-line discussion. He said it
was one of the funniest things he’d read in a while.
That’s where I heard the name before! I wasn’t
really paying attention because it had nothing to do
with main discussion.”
“What was the URL for the comic?” Daniel asked.
After the Airman answered, he turned to one of the
computers that had an outside link. Typing in the
URL, he found himself at the main site. A quick
search of the archives revealed another answer and
a big question. “I’ll be...”
“Jack,” Daniel turned the screen to O’Neill. “Meet
the ‘Post Dated Check Loan’.”
“Oh c’mon.” O’Neill sat back in exasperation,
“What kind of idiot names his ship after a
O’Neill caught Sam staring at him archly. He
glared at her, “That is not the same thing!”
End pt 01