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Xander AKA The Snake Charmer

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Summary: On that fateful Halloween night, Ethan had an idea for revenge on someone instead of irritating Giles.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Movies > Kill BillEdScottFR1353,58803416,03511 Mar 065 Apr 06No

Chapter 5

Title: Xander AKA The Snake Charmer (5/?)
Author: Ed Scott

Disclaimer: All characters belong to their rightful owners... none of
who are me.

Summary: On that fateful Halloween night, Ethan had an idea for revenge on someone instead of irritating Giles.

Pairing: C/X

Rating: PG 13

The next day started like any other on the Hellmouth. Xander woke up on Buffy’s couch. Willow woke up in Buffy’s spare room and Buffy awoke in her room holding Mr. Gordo. Joyce was out of town at an art auction.

Xander was roused of his sleep at 8 am by his cell phone ringing. It took five rings before he answered it.

“What?” At 8am in the morning, on a Saturday, Xander was possessed by Ms. Parker.

“Is this Xander?” There was a rough voice on the other end.

“And if it is?”

“This is Bill. I’ll be in town in a couple of hours. I want to meet you.”

“To kill me, you mean?”

“No. We’ll talk when I get there.”

“We’ll meet at the Espresso Pump. It’s in public. And right now, I don’t trust you.”

“Why not?”

“Other than the fact you’re an assassin who got conned into killing a Slayer?”

“What do you mean I was conned?”

“Twenty years ago, when Jonathan Wyndam-Pryce hired you to kill a Slayer who was getting too independent, was in fact, his second in command Quentin Travers.”

“We’ll talk about this when we get there. We’ll have lunch. I’m buying.”

“Fine, but when the Slayer sees you, she will try to kill you.”

“She can try, and might succeed. But it won’t be easy for her. And it amazes me how’re you not saying how it’s wrong I do what I do.”

“As long as you and your group don’t come after my friends, I could care less what you do for a living.”

“Fine. I’ll be with Kiddo and we’ll see you around one o’clock. Is that good for you?”

“Yes it is, Bill. I’ll see you two at one at the Espresso Pump. Bye.”


Espresso Pump, One p.m.

Xander was waiting for Beatrix and Bill. They pulled up in a cherry red convertible. They looked like a father and daughter getting a cup of coffee, but Xander knew better. Everyone else changed their opinions when they saw the two strangers holding hands like two lovers.

They ordered their drinks, walked over to Xander’s table and sat down.

“It’s nice to meet you, Xander. I’m Bill and this is Beatrix Kiddo.”

“Hello Bill. A pleasure seeing you again, Beatrix. Now that the introductions are made, what would you like to talk about?”

“What are your plans for your life? Now the knowledge of everything I can do.”

“How do you know this?”

“Last night, on the way here, when we stopped for gas, I bought every Twinkie the store had. I proceeded to eat all of it at once without making a mess, and then I showed Kiddo here how to do the same. I could never do that before yesterday, nor did I have a desire to. So, it made sense that I got that skill from you. I figured you got a copy of my skills as well. What training are you going to do to learn the skills your new knowledge has given you?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it. Any ideas?”

Beatrix and Bill looked at each other and smiled. Xander did not like what he was seeing.

The End?

You have reached the end of "Xander AKA The Snake Charmer" – so far. This story is incomplete and the last chapter was posted on 5 Apr 06.

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