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Freed from Bond-age...

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Summary: This is why Wise and I shouldn't be allowed in the same IM window. An Illyria "When I Woke Up" drabble. Warning: irritated Illyria. Is it really necessary to say that there's death? Isn't that a given?

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Movies > James Bond(Moderator)JoeHundredaireFR1836932269,64421 Jun 0612 Oct 06Yes

The End

Title: Freed from Bond-age...
Author: Wise
Rating: R/FR18.
Pairings: Illyria/James Bond
Disclaimer: Not quite sure who owns the Buffyverse or the Bondverse, but I know for a fact that it's not me...
Summary: Never try to get into Illyria's pants... even if she's loaded...
Joe's Note: This one belongs to Wise. I didn't write it, I'm not going to continue it, and the only reason I'm posting it is because he thinks it's stupid but I think it's too hilarious to let die. Maybe if you all review a lot, he'll make more... but where do you go from here?

     Illyria came to awareness in a silk-sheeted bed. Immediately, her superior senses probed her surroundings and informed her that she was lying prone in a dark hotel room, and she was not alone; a heat source identifiable as a human male lay naked at her side.

     She considered the sleeping form beside her. She didn't recognize him, but whoever he was, he would pay for daring to experience such physical intimacy with her shell. On the desk was a marriage certificate with the names, 'James and Illyria Bond.'

     Briefly, a thought occurred to her: should she take this as an opportunity to explore the kind of intimacy that Wesley had denied her? Perhaps she could come to love this human. Perhaps they were made for each other. And then she stopped channeling the cosmic stupidity principle. She rose and took his spine for a trophy, repaying in full his temerity in thinking to take advantage of her shell via use of the poison 'alcohol'.

     She left the dead man on the bed behind her.
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